Skip to main content

How to camp in Botswana

Just a few notes for when camping and game viewing in Botswana:

First things first, you actually need to be in Botswana and not just in a sauna with donkey noises playing in the background.

Next up, is your trusty stead. It should be able to handle thick sand and water. No, not your company's work vehicle that could bottom out on sand and leave you trying to dig it out with sticks and your hands (Totally didn't happen to me in the Kasane game reserve right next to a sign that said 4x4 vehicles only).

A tent or your own fold out palace with tv, wifi and a generator to power a small city is recommended.

Food! 1kg of biltong per person per day (none of this sharing your snacks rubbish). Coffee and rusks - it is a well known fact that the smell of coffee attracts predators and so when you hear your alarm go off at 3 in the morning you need that extra bit of motivation to get up. Meat - Viennas for lunch, steak for dinner. Viennas can also be used to put under your fellow campers tent to attract hyena into camp (Again, totally wasn't me). Decide on an amount of water and times that by three, the Botswana heat will get you. Wakey Wakey Eggs and Bakey!

Ice! This is like gold in the bush can be exchanged for small children and eating utensils.

Lights are a must if you don't want to be running into camp like a little girl after seeing a hippo (definitely not me)
When leaving your campsite don't leave anything behind. There is a story of someone leaving their car windows open with a cooler box inside. Returning from the ablution blocks they were left with an empty cooler box and a car smelling like baboon poop because when baboons are excited they tend to poop everywhere.


Binoculars are always a must for being able to correctly identify elephant shaped anthills, antelope shaped stumps and leopard shaped logs.



Spent two hours following a group of Wild Dogs and watched them chase an Impala

No Roads = No Driver


Khwai Shopping Centre - Queues for days

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Top 5 Things Guest Say

Just a list of things guests say before getting on small aircraft and the pilot's usual sarcastic replies  1.)Is this your first flight? Yip, let's see how it goes hey 2.)Does this plane have a parachute? Yes, but unfortunately only under the pilot's seat 3.)Do you know where you're going? Not a clue, let's just take off and hope for the best 4.)Will you be serving in flight snacks? Yes, you can feast your eyes on the beautiful views outside 5.)Can I fly the plane? You might have to if I fall asleep Nope, I haven't just devoured an entire Impala How to handle the heat in Maun Old and Trembleys hiding from a Dust Devil

Sup man

Soooo this is a blog and not a porn site, so for all the perverts out there, it's time to make like a donkey dick aaaaaaaand hit the road, as someone from Botswana would say. My name is Pat but I go by many a name such as P dizzle (gangster name), Pat me groin (Scottish /I'm not too sure name), Patches O'hoolahan (dodgeball name), Patrice(when I'm dressed in ladies clothes name, wait , maybe that's not the best thing to put out there on the Internet) and Veej(family name). The list goes on but I won't bore you with more names and my weird dressing habits. I fly planes in the land of donkeys and cows, Botswana. Which is why I have started a blog as I'm sure there will be some memorable moments. So here's a quick story about a mate of mine. Let's call him George. George is a pilot and was doing an hour and a half flight from the Linyanti to a place called Kasane(See very detailed map below). On this flight his stomach started to give him signals that